A resurfacing photo of Democratic New York Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez walking to President Trump’s 2019 State of the Union Address with a bulging disc in her pocket is leading Twitter users to speculate it could be a tin of Zyn Nicotine Pouches.
Hold up… AOC packs Zyns? This changes everything pic.twitter.com/QWRioFe9EW
— Matt Laine (@DaFiretruck) March 8, 2024
This is big if true. Of course AOC‘s policy positions are abhorrent and the fact that she’s completely receded into the Democratic machine after running a campaign where she pledged to dismantle it is hypocritical at best and morally bankrupt at worst. But I can forgive all of that if I find out she throws in the occasional Zynston Churchill. (RELATED: Social Media Erupts After Chuck Schumer Calls For Zyn Crackdown)
Would I vote for her? No. Would I buy her a beer and ask if she has a spare 6mg on her? Damn straight.
While some wet blankets are “WELL AKSHULLAY”-ing us with the information that it’s far more likely the bulging disc is a birth control container given House Dems’ women’s rights-themed clothing, I choose to live in a world where AOC packs fat lip pouches. I have to believe it. I can’t think that someone like AOC is so utterly unredeemable as a person that she doesn’t even toss in the occasional Oprah Zynfrey to take the edge off.
AOC PACKS ZYN 😯
OMG SHES SO COOL
🥴🥴🥴 pic.twitter.com/cwjUHTI0qe
— Matthew (@mz_prosperous) March 8, 2024
If AOC (AOZ, if you will) really does walk around the U.S. Capitol locked and loaded and ready to throw in a Thomas Jefferzyn at a moment’s notice, that instantly makes her ten times more likeable to me. Just rolling up to the State of the Unzyn with an upper bunkie. Not too shabby, AOZ.